17 September 2009

Cricket Mom, what thinketh thee?

I received the following email from one of the moms in the new co-op we recently formed:

“Can't we buy crickets at the pet store to give the kids with their Chinese Cricket cages in week 10? I thought that might be fun.

What thinketh you?”

She thought that might be fun.

Fun she thought.

Uh-huh. Fun.

Fun is dancing through a sprinkler.

Fun is eating watermelon on a hot day.

What is fully apparent to me is that Cricket Mom has not experienced the unmitigated JOY that is “tearing around the house at 2am on a Sunday morning trying desperately to find that d@mn cricket!!!”

What thinketh you?

What thinketh me, indeed!

What I THINKETH, Cricket Mom, is that with two pre-schoolers in my house, we are currently exceeding the maximum allowable decibel level on our street.

What I THINKETH is that my sanity is not likely to last through a cricket permanently residing in our home.

Please remember, Cricket Mom, that we live semi-in-the-country and a late-night Big Mac run was recently averted abruptly due to a skunk on my front porch. A skunk whose very presence held me hostage in my own home.

I’m just telling you right now that if you give my kid a cricket, said bug will soon end up “going to live with a nice family on a big farm where he has plenty of room to run”. Or, to put it in adult vernacular, buried next to the hamster.

Oh, and I’ll give you three guesses as to what YOUR kid is getting from my family for Christmas:

1. Drum set

2. Kazoo

3. Ant farm with a crack in it.

Happy Holidays!